OkCupid review: members online activity 30

I concur and agree with this complaint about Ok Cupid... You know that "funny feeling" you get when something "ain't quite right"? Well, after barely 2 months on that Website I started to get that feeling... The response rate to my messages was far too LOW for people who I otherwise matched quite well with on several points... This kind of stuff just makes you scrutinize things a bit closer than normal?
TIP OFF#1: Well, there is this one lady who I had marked as a "Favorite", which means that each time she allegedly Logged In, it told me "so-n-so" has just Logged in, usually with A.) A pop up picture of the person, B.) A little "Thought Bubble" where all of your "Favortes" are located, and C.) A little "Online Now" Banner across bottom of person's picture when you visit their profile... Well, I visit her profile, and while there, the little Though Bubble where the "Favorites" are located suddenly disappears... HOWEVER, the "Online Now" Banner is STILL across the bottom of her picture! Typically, BOTH the Banner and the Thought Bubble should go off TOGETHER... But, NO... ONE of them is STILL ON! So, I recylced all pages to make sure that maybe it was Browser not catching up, etc., and the Banner in her profile stays "On", despite all other indications she was "Offline"... So, Oooops, I guess their Bogus software got out of "Synch"?

TIP OFF #2: Visits to my profile by "DEAD" Icons! I often wondered why I would sometimes get visited by these ghostly icons without pictures or with "0% Match", "0% Friend", "0% Enemy" stat on them? Well, it appears that their software randomly creates "Visits" to your profile to give you the impression that someone has dropped by, when they perhaps really didn't... Like, lhy would a DEAD Icon want to visit you?

TIP OFF #3: I saw one lady's profile actually CHANGE names! SAME person, SAME profile, etc., but she suddenly appeared under a DIFFERENT name!
So Yeah, there's definitely something "hinky" or strange about this Website... And I think that's one reason why my response rate was so low, because I likely I was writing to a "Dead" Icons or Profiles...

Ken, you're a [censor]ing idiot.

Sometimes people make alternate, anonymous accounts so they can stalk people without being traced. sometimes people will change things (like names) if they think it is hindering their appeal etc. The online-now status does linger after people sign off - they do that on purpose probably to increase interest/traffic. But [censor] you for getting spooked out by a free online dating site.

Yeah, And your Dick is about as long as your paragraph-- Dork. No wonder that site's so F*cked Up...

you are so right! read this blogger on what happened to my friend on okcupid! i deleted my account from okcupid as soon as i saw what she was going through! something is not right with this website! if you report issues to them, they never take care of them because they don't care! thanks for warning us! read this blogger, if you get the chance!
http://datingdisastersexposed.blogspot.com/

@KenIsStupid: Also, sometimes the thought bubble is off when someone is online because they've turned off the IM/chat feature. I do that frequently so I can browse in peace.

It's true, though, that the online now! feature is a little buggy- intentional or not, I don't know.

Ellen's complaint is valid inasmuch as the software has a glitch. Ken's complaint is way over exaggerated. Yes, their software has a glitch, and I wish they would fix it! People are shown as "online" for about a half hour to an hour after they have logged off, or their IM bubble is still on after they have shut it off. And the response rate to your messages being low? That's ALL guys! I've talked to many of these women. They are literally overwhelmed by the onslaught of messages they get from us guys, and they can't keep up with them, so they become very selective. Note the response rate for each woman in the upper right hand corner (indicated by red, yellow, or green). Most are red. And the number of men who send incredibly inappropriate messages (the women have shown me the content) is unbelievable! I carefully compose my messages to increase my return rate, making sure I talk about things they've talked about in their profile. Do you? I get MANY responses that start off with "I don't usually respond to messages on OKCupid, but..." And make sure you put up good pics! I found out I didn't get responses from many because I was wearing sunglasses in my profile pic, and they couldn't see my eyes. Remember that, Ken -- women want to see eyes to judge guys! So, Ken, it's not the website. It's YOU!

Oh... one more thing... those so-called "dead" profiles with little info? Some are new people who just haven't filled out their profiles yet (I go back sometimes to see info added.) But others are indeed scammers, but they have nothing to do with OKCupid. There are also others with "too good to be true" profiles that are scammers from places like Russia and Africa. You know how I know? Well, sometimes, OKCupid itself picks up on something they find suspicious and attaches a cautionary warning to emails from the suspicious profiles. But also because when I see a suspicious profile, like one with broken English or things that don't add up, I copy a distinctive phrase from the profile and Google it. Then I'll often find a whole host of profiles from OTHER dating sites with the same wording but different people with different ages, pictures, and even genders, and sometimes reports on "scammer" sites. Is it OKCupid creating these profiles? Of course not! It's the scammers themselves! And OKC provides a "report" button on each profile. I use it often when I find a scammer, and OKC usually has the profile removed pretty quickly.

In other words, Ken, like anywhere, Caveat emptor. Buyer beware. Be a smart consumer. Put effort into your search. Be respectful with your messages, and give them a reason to respond. But don't blame the website for your own failures!

Dear Greenwood or whatever you are... All I can say is that you are a highly "overpresumtuous" human being... Too much inside knowlege of how that site functions? Either you live a very "charmed" life - some people do, or you are somehow PR for OK Cupid? How do you KNOW that the people were "logged off"? How do you know those so-called "Dead" profiles are NEW people, who simply hadn't failed to fill out their pofiles? And WHY on earth would you be interested enough in a "Dead" profile to WANT to "go back" and view it? Also, claims of talking to "many" women is also highly unlikely... And as for the balance of your response, I am NOT STUPID! I know about scammers, being polite when writing a lady, showing eyes in a picture, etc. Get real, Man... You somehow have developed a rather "high" opinion of yourself? So, give other people some credit... You DON'T know all of the answers. Especially what makes women do the things that they do? Bottom line: Ok Cupid, just like Facebook is nothing but another clever MARKETING TOOL. The whole idea is to "hook people in " and keep them coming back... And if that means scamming or stringing some people along, they will do it... And you have ABSOLUTELY NO PROOF how many of the so-called women that you communicated with were "Real", "Fakes", Ok Cupid Staff, etc. The Website IS a Scam... I even saw one lady's profile disappear and come back with a GUY'S NAME and PICTURE! Explain that one, Sherlock? Sure, *some* people may make a connection... That's the law of averages... However, I bet most men and women leave that sight disappointed... And if you never exchange any PHONE NUMBERS? The probability of that person NOT being "Real" is very high...

Well, Ken, I got on the site in August, and I've simply taken the time to figure things out. I currently have 19 phone numbers on my cell from OKC women, although as of tonight, I think that #19 may be the last one I need. I can tell you the women are real. I've talked to them on the phone. I've dated them. You're judging the site by the scammers that will try to use it for their own purposes. I, too, have seen profiles come back with different pictures and genders. That's not OKC's fault or doing -- they're victims as well. Have you reported these when you've seen them? I do, and OKC takes them down. I just spent an extremely enjoyable evening talking on the phone with someone I met on OKC -- we have an unbelievable 99% match! I'm quite excited about her, thanks to OKC. Good luck, but don't blame the website if you fail!

Ken, just came back and looked at your original email. You're making a lot of false assumptions that I thought I'd try to address, as some people already have in this thread. I'll respond per your "Tip-off" #'s:

Tip-off #1: You are correct that when youy save someone as a favorite, you will indeed get a notification that they logged in, as well as they will appear in a list on the left side-bar. But you are wrong about your other points -- EVERYONE sees the "online now" banner when they visit someone's page, and EVERYONE sees the blue chat bubble when someone has it turned on. You don't have to have someone saved as a favorite for that. "dizzkp" is right -- most women turn off the blue chat bubble so that they are not bombarded with constant IM's from guys. If you haven't noticed, there's an icon at the bottom right of the screen to quickly turn on and turn off that function. So someone can often be "online now", but have the chat bubble turned off. But as I and others have said -- OKC definitely has a glitch where the "online now" stays on LONG after the user has left. That IS a problem, but I'm not going to assume it's at all intentional on OKC's part.

Tipoff #2: You're WAY off on this one, Ken. No picture simply means that the person chose not to upload one. This doesn't mean that they're ugly, or married and hiding. I got into a conversation with one woman who contacted me without a photo, telling her I wasn't interested in someone who didn't post their photo. She explained she was a teacher, and that her students regularly look through dating sites and have found other teachers on them! She didn't want to be one of them, but willingly sent me photos privately. Another who I remember DID have photos took them down, and explained to me that she was tired of getting lewd messages from guys. She said taking them down and selectively providing them to guys she was interested in solved that problem. Likewise, 0% matches means that the user hasn't bothered to answer any survey questions. Yes, that raises a red flag for me, but often that's all it is -- they just didn't want to answer questions. Some have told me they'd rather learn about each other the old fashioned way -- by talking, not answering surveys. (Personally, I found all of those women to be WAY too private for me.)

Tipoff #3: People can change their names if they want, Ken. You actually have to pay to be a member to do that (something I've never done), but they can! I also know one woman who took down her profile completely and put a different one back up. She had some of the same pics, and some of the same wording, but she clearly had wanted to start from scratch. We talked after her second profile was created, and she was indeed real -- just changing things up a bit. But, yes, as I said in an earlier post, there ARE scammers on this and EVERY other dating site -- watch out for them. Most are foreigners. I have found red flags include (a) posting just one single photo of a very sexy, beautiful woman, (b) broken English or a complete misuse of certain words, (c) listing themselves as "Native American" under the false assumption that they believe this means being born in the US, (d) overuse of the term "lady" in their self-summary, i.e., "I am a faithful lady" or "I am an active lady" and other phrasing that just doesn't sound like an American would be saying it, and (e) thin profiles with almost no personal details and short summaries. I've also found that none of these red flags are absolute -- I've found the same things on legitimate profiles from time to time, but these DO raise the odds it's a scammer. As I have said in a previous post, I usually do a test by copying a distinctive phrase from the profile (if they wrote something at all) and googling it in quotes -- it's sometimes AMAZING what comes up. It makes you wonder just what these people are trying to pull. But is it OKCupid's fault? No. You find the same scammers on all the other dating sites as well.

As for me, I was initially upset with OKC because my ex, who I desperately wanted to get back with, found another guy through the site. A mutual friend has told me she's now talking about wanting to marry and have kids with the guy (that killed me). But now it looks like I may have found my "match", too, after 7 months of looking. So I guess it worked for both of us. Bottom line, Ken, you're just plain wrong about it being a scam!

UPDATE: After returning to Okstupid for a month or so, I have seen at least three of those "Ghost" or "Empty" profiles ANSWER A QUESTION! How does an "Icon", -- No profile, No picture, No Data answer a question, e.g., "23 minutes ago", etc.? I rest my case with this Website... It's simply a "Formula", a "Shooting Gallery", like mechanical Ducks at a carnival shooting Booth... The profiles mostly circulate, randomly "Popping up" for you to take a "Shot", etc. Then, they collapse down and circle around again for the next one to "Pop up", etc. Very clever, but very CRUEL, because you are playing with people's emotions. Of course, some people are going to connect on there? However, I think very, very FEW... The majority of people on there probably still just "give up" and move on, disappointed. As for SCAMMERS, for some reason they have NO desire to "Fix it"... Much like the stupid voting system on American Idol... They DON'T CARE to Fix it!

Ken -- you should NOT be on a dating website. From what I've just read, who would date you anyway? Too paranoid, and honestly I think your new girlfriend wouldn't like that.

I have been on okcupid and gotten off and back on. I have everything the same but my username. It seems to keep that username even after you delete your profile. So I have to use another name. Doesn't mean I am fake. But, there is a lot of scammers on okcupid. But there are a lot on match.com. I am.on pof but not as many scammers as those two sites. Okcupid has a lot of scammers. The men usually don't put their zodiac sign, and they always seem to be engineers, and they always make around 100.000 or more. Their usually widowed with no kids. They use the words am and kindly, and immediatly want your email so they can get off the site. They use to ask to chat on yahoo. But I think I have made a mistake telling these scamers what their doing wrong and I know their scammers because of it. But they seem to be changing those tbingsi mention. I can spot them a mile away. And my boyfriend would sign out and it showed him on around and hour or more on. Also my ex boyfriend is on here now and let me tell you, almost everything he has on his profile and questions are all lies. From his height to what he likes and does. One question for your typical night on a Friday. He said, either bowling or playing pool. I went with him 14 months and not once did he bowl or mention going bowling. I have seen him play pool once and that was only because we went to eat and they have a pool table. And this is walking distance from his house. His typical Friday night was at home watching television. That was all he did. Boring. But, that can happen when you meet someone out in a bar. They can lie. I did go out with someone that looked 175 but in person 400. You just have to weed through them. Sorry about the long message. Nancy

Yes for men it is even worse - for every man with fake profile there are 100 women using pictures NOT of themselves but porn stars and models such as Adrienne Manning, Lia 19 and many others. Ofcourse match.com is not the only and probably not the biggest offender of this.For example Zoosk, okcupid, and Facebook has so many females who put a profile with pic's of porn stars and models claiming them to be pictures of themselves. Now it would be very easy for match and facebook and others to use the automatic picture scanner :
http://www.google.com/imghp?hl=en&tab=wi to get a readout which will come up with the celebrity associated with the picture. For example I have heard that the owner/founder of facebook M.Zuckenberg or some like that is worth over 10 million dollars so it is likely the company is worth a million or more and they could very easily implement this type of check along with match.com, Zoosk and others !

Pls be careful of the woman by this name Cheryl Snyder, she keeps spoiling other because they dont want her

Oh my dear. The stuff you don't know! You're saying about surgery. My ex boyfriend's dad was dying of late stage cancer, he literally had hours left and I've seen my ex boyfriend browsing okcupid while sitting beside his father's death bed. 3 hours after I saw this, the man died. This is to give you an idea of what kind if people go on these dating sites. The fact that he/she was online on the day of surgery is most likely correct.

I have been trying to register online dating website more than a month using different email address as I got notified "UNABLE TO CONNECT THE SERVER" CAN I GET A SUPPORT and explanation? My email address is
etery_kg@mail.ru

Please be advised username livingsoul66 is a scam. Asks for money. Single father in military. Scammed me. To not fall for this user.

I would like to know what is my violation why you have to suspended my account. I just can't understand why. Thanks

I am reporting someone making a fake page with my numbers and the person creating this is Dominique daily she live at 2 Preston at apt 5 worcester ma. Shes been harrassing me for a while now.. Pls take down my numbers and email genesse92@gmail.com my numbers below . Shes going on different websites posting my numbers and email

I've been a member of OKC for 7+ years. And in the last 6 months they've ruined the app. I liked it because it WASN'T tinder. Now I can't even see my matches if I've passed or like them already. Seriously WTF? I want the old OKC back. The new one is absolutely [censored]ing awful

Hi my account has been suspended and I am constantly referred back to my account When I tried to get in touch with you to see what's going on !
Silver kid .

Pls be careful of the woman by this name Cheryl Snyder, she keeps spoiling other because they dont want us.

the company is selling sex the profiles are fake and not real at all people message u ask to do stuff which you never say yes to ever this site needs to be shut down period total crap and worthless site the company takes your money like pof does and does not care think twice before using this service

As i was using okcupid in bio i have mentioned my instagram username..as long back o deleted my account..but since morning i m getting msg requests on instagram from many people..as they can still see my profile on cupid..i need an immediate action to be taken

I only Changed my pictures then I discovered that my account is suspended.

1 year + been using OkCupid

I am the person check my social media and even google.

I tired to sign with my email yet didn't work and also try to sign in with my Facebook. Didn't work still showing account suspended.

Please help and activate my account back.

Thanks

Please i did nothing wrong to be suspended am asking for a reactivation.email owenlittle1@gmail.com

I am canceling my account after this weekend complete joke of a web site they do not care at all whos fake or real

I have seen many women that I feel are right for me, I purchased I "Really Like"

for additional money but I don't feel you have enough women on the site for me. So I'd like a refund.

This company is a scam and full of fake profiles and bots they do not respond to emails period this company has nothing better to do then take money from people do not purchase any thing with this site its scam

I would like to report John C. Whom I matched with last week. He was very sexually inappropriate toward me by talking to me in a very sexual way. He said what all he wanted to do to me and me to him. Please remove this pervert from your website.